an empowered no

An Empowered No

You know what’s super empowering? Being able to say no to something and have it be respected. An empowered no.

I got caught up in a sales process recently, and my brain wanted to invest in the program. I even told the lady that I was “very interested”. However a few hours later when I went and used my intuitive guidance on the decision, I came away with a strong “no” as an answer. Twice

I was confused. I wanted the results she was offering! I thought I could manifest a way to pay for it easily.

I told a trusted friend about what I was considering. She also got an intuitive “no” answer.

This made me have a wtf type of moment. I started doubting myself and ended up in a spiral of “what the hell am I even doing?”. How could what I wanted, and my inner guidance be so different?

The next day I sat and meditated, did my mindset and belief imprinting, got into my high vibe place, then opened up my notebook where I talk with my business guides.

I had a “tell me about this” conversation and the results were incredibly surprising.

I’m still addicted to the illusion of control.

Doing this program and achieving the results I thought I wanted, would make me feel like I didn’t have control, and that would not lead me where I want to go

The most likely outcome of this for me would be that it would be another investment where I wouldn’t get the results.

The timing is off.

There’s still some beliefs in me that are limiting me from the results I want.

It felt odd to receive this knowledge, like “awe man… really? Still?!?” but it was also a great relief. 

I have more stuff to shift, and that’s ok. I’ll keep on doing things and growing at a slower pace.

Giving an empowered no

I did an empowered thing. I messaged the woman, thanked her for her time and said it wasn’t right for me, and wished her a successful launch and cancelled the meeting we’d scheduled. I didn’t ghost or leave it hanging.

I gave a respectful, and empowered no. And I received back wishes for my own success and an invitation to connect at a future date.

She didn’t “handle my objections” and try to manipulate me into buying anyway. She thanked me, and moved on.

Being a sensitive empathic type, I never want to hurt other people or their feelings. I’ve ghosted many times before, as I felt that was easier than just saying “no thanks, this isn’t right for me”. Saying no has been hard for me before. I’m so grateful that I’ve developed this method of using my intuition to make decisions, and that I deeply trust my intuition.

Previously, I’ve had a really hard time making decisions. I’ve made many that have cost me thousands of dollars on programs and coaching that just haven’t worked out. I’m still carrying that around with me. I feel fine about it, I know that my business will eventually get me where I want to be financially. I’m excited and expecting this to happen, and I also know that there’s a helluva lot of divine timing stuff that always shows up for me.

No is a complete sentence

Learning that “no” is a complete sentence years ago has helped me get to this point. Of being able to say an empowered no. This is not something I would’ve done previously. I would’ve likely ghosted, not responded and just felt guilty that I was likely hurting the other person’s feelings.

I’ve been on the receiving end of being ghosted, and wished many times that people would just say that they weren’t interested, instead of nothing at all, and me having to eventually go “I guess they’re not interested”. Then I could take the energy I’d been investing in them and move on to the next person.

The truth is I don’t want to work with people who aren’t right for what I’m offering. I need it to be a win-win and work for both of us. I’m not going to manipulate or coerce anyone into a sale.

This is, what I call, a feminine energy way of doing sales. Selling is serving when done this way. We offer a solution to someone’s problem.

Previously we’ve been exposed to the masculine energy which I describe as being all “pound you into the ground and get the yes out of you”. 😉

That is why many people feel that sales are “icky”, and don’t do sales themselves. We’ve experienced this steamroller phenomenon, and been manipulated into things we didn’t want when our no wasn’t respected. Or we were too afraid to even say no.

The next time someone tries to sell you something:

I encourage you, to take a look next time someone tries to sell you something. Are you saying a “no” in protection, from previous experiences of being sold something you don’t want? Or is it actually an empowered no coming from your deep inner knowing?

Stand in your power and say no if it’s not right for you. People can respect that, and if they can’t, you don’t want to be working with them anyway.

In my mastermind group recently we had a conversation about this. 90% of the group didn’t want to do sales, because they didn’t want to be seen in this way, as a “pushy salesperson”. All of our businesses are not doing as well as we want, and it’s partly because we are not “selling” our offers enough. 

Meaning we’re not putting them out there and telling people about them. All because of some experiences we’ve had where we’ve been sold things we don’t want, and our “no” wasn’t respected.

How fascinating.

I’ve seen both kinds of sales energy in the online space. It’s so empowering to be able to offer things that solve a problem people have. This is service, this is the reason we do what we do. We have things we offer that solve problems, and there are people who have those problems who are looking for them to be solved. Make a connection between those two people and extreme magic can happen.

Abundance is everywhere, there’s so many ideal clients who want your offering. Go and tell people about it. “I solve this problem, do you know anyone who has this problem?”

If people say “no” maybe it’s just a timing thing. Maybe they’re not ready and they need to see more from you first. Maybe it’s got nothing at all to do with you, and they’re in a crazy time in their lives. 

Shifting into an abundance mindset makes everything so much easier. I’m so appreciating how much my mindset is shifting, and how much brighter and better my world is because of that.

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